agony

Email from SV:

The ----- tensor equation has ---- independent components. You need to write down ------ for each of the -----components.
You need to apply the ---- to the terms involving the ---------. We need to skype to have this discussed.







Reply (in my head):

Dr XX,

I think the simulation is very complicated to solve. Maybe I need another one semester to get the work done. What you told me about all the bunch of equations are understandable. However, to translate what you said into coding is such a nightmare to me. It seems easy for you but it's very difficult for me. Please give me a pass. I wanna go back to my hometown.. ;(


Real reply.

Can we skype tomorrow?

Focus and enjoy writing

Hi friends..

Just a quick post to share what I had. I love sharing sebab selama ni kalau saya share something kat orang, automatically orang tu atau orang lain pun akan share benda-benda yang berfaedah untuk saya. Hidup untuk memberi. In sya Allah..

Number 1. 
I found a good way to help me focus while writing my thesis, reading papers or studying. Kadang-kadang bila kita dah set, ok pada pukul sekian ni aku nak mula writing atau mula study. Bila dah tiba waktunya, kita pun duduk, on laptop dan otak mula menerawang fikir nak buat apa ni. Kadang-kadang check emails dulu, facebooks atau check blogs. Lepas tu apa.. masih lagi warm up, klik sana, klik sini. Susahnya la nak start engine padahal kerja menimbun. Apa yang saya buat ialah dengan mendengar alunan muzik piano yang santai, rasa macam kat tepi pantai je uols. Mungkin juga saya ni seorang yang jenis audio, suka mendengar yang indah-indah dan suka jugak buat video sebenarnya. Tapi sebab tak banyak masa, hobi buat video tu letak tepi dulu. hehe.. Ok,  ni antara favorite playlist muzik saya

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SZqiKKMMaU0&list=PLB2D8CF5B5F140AB1




Number 2.
Oleh kerana saya sekarang berada di fasa menulis dan draft saya asyik ditendang banyak kali oleh "komunis", saya fikir saya perlu bantuan. Chapter 2 dan 3 saya asyik dikomen oleh SV, dia suruh betulkan itu, bila saya dah betulkan dan submit semula dia suruh betulkan yang ini pula, submit lagi dan dia komen suruh make it smooth, tukar subsection ke hadapan, dan banyak lagilah. Setiap kali hantar, setiap kali tu lah kena betulkan. So, setelah banyak kali fikir, akhirnya saya langgan
Grammarly.
Grammarly.
Grammarly.

Yes, kena bayar. Memanglah banyak yang free kat internet, tapi saya rasa ini yang terbaik. Orang putih yang makan roti hari-hari pun langgan Grammarly, lagila kita ni yang makan tempe. hakhak.. Benda ni bukan saja boleh check grammar, malah dia bagi suggestion dan huraian kenapa ayat tu tak berapa sesuai. Dan lagi, ia juga boleh check plagiarism sekali. Baru dua hari pakai, dan saya rasa lebih konfiden menulis dan yang bestnya dapat mengurangkan stress. Menulis sambil dengar alunan piano yang best memang feeling habis.



Thats' it. I hope these are beneficial for you too. 

Komunisme

Hari ni 25 Dec. Semua org di US cuti krismas. Tak ada seketul manusia pun di universiti. Aku sorang je meredah kesejukan berjalan ke office. Musim sejuk kali ni sangat mencabar. Dah 4 tahun kat sini, patutnya dah imun tapi badan seakan-akan makin tak reti nak adapt. Ini tandanya  kerinduan kat Malaysia semakin membuak-buak. Rindu cuacanya yang malar sepanjang tahun. Tak perlu nak risau kalau tak pakai jaket tebal, glove dan sebagainya. Takdenya dada ko sejuk, menggigil dan batuk-batuk.

Ah. Mungkin orang Malaysia jeles dengan cuaca 4 musim di luar negara. Untuk tempoh waktu yang singkat bolehla rasa best tapi kalau berbulan-bulan mcm ni, haih.. tak tahanlah. Tak tahan dengan cuaca ekstrem di sini. Kalau panas, panas yg amat sgt, kalau sejuk, sejuk giler sampai ke tulang. Pegang apa benda pun semua sejuk. Sekarang ni pun aku dah risau bila tiba musim bunga nanti. Debunga2 yang berterbangan tu bahaya ok. Boleh menyebabkan mata ko gatal, hidung berair, dan mengganggu saluran pernafasan. Gejala-gejala ini dikenali sebagai 'pollen allergy'. Aku dah kena tahun lepas. Yang paling merisaukan Alya lah. Selalu waktu begini, berkurung dalam rumah je jalan penyelesaiannya. Yelah, tapi sampai bila pun ko boleh berkurung, mesti kena keluar gak kan pergi office, beli grocery dsb. Tak bersyukur ka? hah.. bukanlah begitu. Sakit itu kan penghapus dosa. Itupun kalau kita ikhlas dan redha. Yup, aku ikhlas, aku redha (In sya Allah) tapi sangat2 tak sabar nak balik Malaysia for good.

Aku patutnya habis PhD bulan 8, 2014. Lapan bulan lagi beb. Aku tanya 'komunis' boleh ke aku grad bulan 8 ni. Kalau you all tak tahu siapa 'komunis' yg aku maksudkan tu, dia adalah SV aku ler. Kenapa aku panggil komunis rasanya aku dah cerita kat entry sebelum2 ni. hehe.. Dia cakap

"If you keep this momentum, you will grad on time."

So sbb dia kata boleh, aku pun buat-buat macam bolehla. Kalau org tanya bila balik, dengan slumber aku cakap tahun depan. Walhal, apa yang berlaku dalam diri aku sebenarnya, hanya aku dan Allah saja yang tahu. Aku hanya bersikap positif dan serahkan pada yang Maha Kuasa.

Kalau dikira logik akal, agak sukar nak abis on time sbb aku tak pernah lagi present apa-apa research aku ni. Poster jauh sekali. Aku pun seakan malu, kata study US tapi 1 habuk pun ko tak present. Adalah present tapi kat department sendiri je. Maksud aku takdelah sampai present kat mana2 conference. Entahla, patutnya 2 tahun courseworks dan 2 tahun lagi research. Tapi sebenarnya, yang org lain tak tahu ialah 3 tahun courseworks, so tinggal baki 1 tahun saja utk research. Kat sini, diorang sgt menekankan subjek dlm kelas. Biar 'power' katanya. Power tak power sgtlah tapi pointer aku 3.74. Buat apa nak kisah pointer kan, aku dah ada kerja, lainlah graduate student lain yg masih terkapai-kapai nak kerja mana lepas ni.

Sebenarnya kan, aku pulun buat research start sem lepas tau. Dan sem depan patutnya nak grad???? biar betul? Sekarang ni dah ada 3 chapters. Lagi 2 chapters n 1 chapter conclusion siap ah. Komunis ckp kalau aku nak publish paper dah boleh, tapi dia akan nengok mana2 yg blh ditambah. Sebab katanya dia taknak just publish paper kat conference mana2 tp mesti ada impak. Lagipun kat sini, publish paper bukan syarat untuk grad. As long as you have qualified thesis, that's enough! Aku pun ok je. Katanya yang penting siapkan thesis dulu, nnti lepas dah grad kita boleh discuss lagi camne nak publish.

So guys, itulah perkembangan aku setakat ni. Perjalanan ini tak mudah. Banyak kali jatuh, nangis, luka, letak ubat baik semula dan happy. Macam tulah kitarannya selama ni. Selalu kena marah dgn komunis sampai nangis2 depan dia walaupun kadang2 bukan silap aku. Nasib baik aku ada Allah tempat mengadu.

Semalam aku seakan jumpa 'dead end' sebab aku tak dapat solve one problem. Aku sorang je guna software tu kat sini. Aku dah email author of that journal mintak tlg dia tunjuk macam mana cara sebenarnya. First email, Alhamdulillah dia reply. Sekarang ni menunggu-menunggu jawapan dia. Ah, mungkin die sedang bergembira merayakan krismas. So tenang, sabar, usaha dan solat.

Oh ye. I wanna share this awesome video. Bagus sgt you alls. "How to get what you want from Allah". Mintalah dengan sesungguh hati, menangislah..

Thanks for reading..


Self note:
"Siapkan tesis cepat-cepat. Tak tahan menghadap komunis lama-lama.."

Bila otak kanan mula berbicara

Cerita tentang aku --


Di hati ku lukiskan sebuah impian
Yang aku panggil harapan
Kutentukan sendiri arah serta tujuan
Rela ku tangkis segala cabaran

Jalan ke puncak itu beronak dan berliku
Menyukarkan pendakianku
Namun tetap kugagahi hati yang karat ini
Demi hasrat yang murni

Aku sangkakan harapan semanis impian
Yang menjadi mimpi-mimpi indah insan
Hakikatnya kehidupan tidak sedemikian
Goyah hatiku oleh kenyataan

Tak harus kuturuti kelemahan diri
Tak daya bertahan diuji
Lalu aku mengumpulkan semula kekuatan
Mencari tujuan sebenar kehidupan

Kutemui sumber kekuatan
Rupanya sudah lama aku diperhatikan
Ketenangan menghampiri membuang gundah
Laksana sungai mengalir di taman indah

Jalan ke puncak masih beronak dan berliku
Ku gapai tempat sandaranku
Sedar aku bukan lagi bersendirian
Dialah Yang Maha Mengabulkan Permintaan


-- Nora Jamil, Nov 2013. University of South Carolina.
Inspired by "Hati yang rapuh" Rahimah Rahim.

Random thought

Saat menemui kegagalan tetapi yakin pertolongan Allah itu sangat dekat, adalah sebenar-benar kejayaan. Saat menemui kejayaan tetapi tidak menyedari itu hasil pertolongan daripada Allah, adalah seburuk-buruk kegagalan. Kesimpulannya, kita boleh menjadi orang yang sentiasa berjaya. - Nora Jamil, 2013.

Di penjara waktu

Assalammualaikum.

Hari ni aku nak menulis tentang penjara dan waktu. Ini tak ada mengena dengan lagu Awie yang tajuknya dipenjara janji tu ye. Nyanyi sikit..

"Hati ku digirisnya lagi, kali ini lebih dalam dan pedih, namun aku sudah berjanji, dia cintaku yang terakhir.."

Dah, dah sikit je.. hehe..

Setiap orang mempunyai 24 jam dalam sehari, tiada yang dapat lebih atau kurang. Jika anda seorang academician dan anda rasa anda bekerja lebih dari 40 jam seminggu, post ini ditujukan khas untuk anda. Ha.. cube korang congak, berapa byk masa korang spend utk kerja atau study atau buat research. Sibuk tak? Penat tak? Lebih teruk lagi, kalau weekend pun kena sambung buat keje. Come on lah.. get a life!

Confession: Aku salah seorang daripadanya, yang sentiasa mengejar dan dikejar waktu. Tapi bersyukur sangat bila tgh blogwalking hari tu, terbaca satu artikel yang sangat berguna utk solve masalah ni. Aku rasa macam dah fokus buat kerja sepanjang minggu, tapi bila in the end of the week tup tup keje tak siap2 gak, so takde pilihan, kena sambung buat masa weekend. Aku tak taulah adakah aku ni jenis yang lembab buat keje atau keje memang banyak. Aku rasa dua-dua kot. hehe.. So, aku tau aku perlu berubah, aku taknak hidupku dibelenggu terus menerus dengan kerja-kerja duniawi ini. cewah.. 

40 jam seminggu itu normal, kiranya hari bekerja dari Isnin hingga Jumaat hanya diperuntukkan 8 jam sehari sahaja. 8x5=40. Simple math! haha..

Antara faktor penyebab ketidakcukupan waktu ini adalah anda tidak efisien dalam membuat kerja.  Maksudnya ialah anda suka berangan, tidak fokus, kadang-kadang buka facebook, buka blog, online shopping dan sebagainya. Lagi bermasalah jika anda update status facebook sebelum atau semasa membuat kerja. Ini akan membuatkan anda menjeling-jeling komputer anda kerana terpengaruh untuk melihat feedback dari rakan2 anda. poorahh...

Faktor ke-dua ialah anda "overdo". Maksudnya ialah anda memperuntukkan masa yang banyak untuk sesuatu job. Contoh macam kes aku, bila aku ada presentation, aku lah orang paling sibuk sekali dalam dunia. Baca artikel tu berkali-kali, rujuk banyak sumber, sentiasa fikir apa soalan yang bakal ditanya. Punye dasyat penangan presentation ni bagi aku. Yelah, serik dowh dgn kes masa tahun 2 disini. Bukan aku cakap tak elok kalau nak prepare macam tu sekali, tapi perlu seimbang dengan job lain. Kalau tak research ko tak jalan-jalan. SV pun nanti fikir kita tak efisien.

So, cara penyelesaiannya ialah dengan merekod masa anda setiap hari ketika anda memulakan dan menghabiskan kerja. Tulis dari pukul berapa hingga pukul berapa kita buat sesuatu job. Ini tidak termasuk korang rehat, g toilet, borak-borak dan lain-lain. Korang boleh nengok contoh aku kat bawah ni supaya lebih jelas. Aku baru je start minggu ni ok.

Saksikanlah! saksikanlah olehmu..  hasilnya amat memalukan kerana sesungguhnya aku tak achieve pun 8 jam sehari. Purata 5 jam 30 minit je. Ouch.. patutla keje tak siap! Ini bukan sebab masalah LEBIH 40 jam, tapi KURANG beb.. Memang patutla kena kerja di hujung minggu. Padan muko!

Tapi kan sebenarnya minggu ini dah yang terbaik aku rasa. Aku tak main-main, buka facebook dan blog hanya ketika lunch hour saja. Jadi bagaimana untuk cukupkan 8 jam ye? Perlukah aku datang seawal 8 pagi? Ini tidak mungkin kerana aku perlu menyiapkan Alya ke babysitter dan menguruskan sedikit hal rumahtangga. 

Aku harap aku dapat menemui cara untuk memperbaiki rekod peribadi aku di minggu-minggu akan datang. In shaa Allah.. semoga Allah memberi keberkatan waktu kepada kita semua. Amin..

Back-to-school blues

Yesterday was the first day of Spring 2013 semester. Time flies.. I'm now in the 6th semester of my study. I don't know what I'm thinking, I just forgot to buy notebooks for 3 classes I enrolled this semester. umm.. it's like.. hey! what the..!

To my surprise, I had blues on my first day. I don't feel like to go to school, I feel like I'm a small kid who doesn't want to go to school. Even, Alya is better in managing herself when she went to babysitter.

"bang, camne ni, rasa macam taknak g school. dahla lupa beli notebooks semalam masa kita g shopping. tak ingat langsung!"

"kenapa plak?"

"entahla, takut jumpa SV sebab keje yang dia suruh siapkan masa winter break tak siap"

"la.. abis selama ni sayang buat apa, abg ngk hari2 buat keje"

"memanglah, i rasa pun i tak buang masa sgt masa winter break ni tapi keje still tak siap. tau tak, dalam masa 1 jam i boleh karang ayat tak sampai satu perenggan pun. i xde skill menulisla bang. lambat.. bila i baca research paper, i nak tulis statement die guna ayat I sendiri tapi i tak dapat lari dari struktur ayat die. tak tau nak menjadikan ayat tu suara kita sendiri. rasa macam ayat die dah paling perfect, nak ubah tang mana? last2 cari synonym for some words. x best, tu yang jadi lambat."

"yang, sebab tulah org buat PhD bertahun-tahun."

"huh.. nanti kalau terjumpa SV nak cakap ape?"

"rileksla sayang, SV pun x siap keje die gak"

"haha.. lawak"

p/s: he always know how to cheer me up even though he is not an academician guy.

Latex

Rasanya researcher2 sekalian dah biasa dengar pasal Latex kan. cewahh.. researcher tu.. hehe.. Tapi rasanya benda ni glemer utk mathematicians je kot, sbb ada seorang kawan di UK, die bidang Sains Komputer tapi still guna Microsoft Word utk penulisan tesis. Pelik memang pelik sbb rasanya bidang diorang ni memerlukan byk gak equation2 math. hmm.. (wondering why sambil garu2 kepala yg memang gatal sbb kelumumur, sejuk weh nak mandi n syampoo rambut hari2 di tgh2 musim winter ni..)

Okla, sebenarnya just nak btau, kalau ada siapa2 nak install Latex dlm personal laptop or PC senang saja caranya. Just pergi ke link ni http://www.tug.org/texlive/, pastu klik download, klik install-tl.zip (untuk pengguna window, umm.. rasanya korang sume guna Window kan, kalau bukan, klik the other option k..), pastu extract the zip file, cari file install-tl. klik kat situ dan install. senang je tp amik masa sketla.. kurang 1 jam kot, sempatla korang nak makan biskut kering cecah air nescafe (gulp.. sedapnye, kepingin rasanya tp kat sini xde jual biskut tu..)

Sebelum ni tak taula pulak blh install sendiri, yelah kat US ni kan ketat sket psl install menginstall ni, no pirate2 at all, sume berlesen2 bagai. for the previous laptop pagi-pagi i letak je kt opis technician, suh diorang installkan, pastu petang amik n tinggal pakai je. recently, i beli laptop baru gara-gara sakit hati jiwa n raga ngn laptop lama, lepas install latex trs jd lembab n lembik abis.. mana taknya processor AMD Dual Core je korang. Harap je skrin besar 17.3" kemain, tapi.. hampeh, sesuai utk tonton movies je.

So, utk student2 PhD zaman ciber ni, spec laptop yg sesuai dgn kita ialah Intel i7, 8GB, Windows 7 atau 8. Buat masa skg ni, cukupla kalau nak run latex, matlab and other programs. Screen size plak 14" dah sesedap rasa dah and berat dalam 4 pound lebih tu dlm kategori laratlah kita nak mengusung ke sana sini. Brand x kesah apa2 tp yg tgh glemer di US ni Asus, Lenovo, HP, and Dell. Take note ok. hihi..

Semalam i sibuk apply travel fund utk attend satu conference di Penn state, beriala buat personal laman web, ala yang professor2 ada tu, laman web professional, incl CV, publications, grants, teaching, etc. sbb style di sini mmg cmtu, kalau korang nak apply g workshop or conference diorang akan mintak URL kita. macam good-good je kan. rasa mcm x layak lg kot, pangkal Dr. pun xde lagi. haha. layankan jela.. kalau sudi, jenguk sini:  http://norazalizamohdjamil.wordpress.com/.

I guna wordpress je sbb free, x sempat sgt nk explore benda2 lain. Kalau UMP provide satu sistem personal laman web utk lecturers kan bagus, nampak formal sket. If korang nak buat jugak guna wordpress, blhla tanya i kalau ada masalah. bende ni pening gak nk edit. nak buang button leave comment je, habis masa sejam. Takkan I nak org komen bwk my list of publications kan. Eh, kalau korang tau provider selain wordpress yg lagi best, btau i ea.. hihi.. yang penting FREE.

haish.. sebenarnya nak cerita pasal latex je, ni dah melalut2 ke tempat lain plak. ok, cerita balik pasal latex, actually nak jot down my own notes utk i refer any other time. sebab selalu lupa kalau nk apply something, fikir nak letak usepackage ape, function ape.. alright. here we go..

1. Mengaler perkataan dengan kaler merah.

\usepackage{color}

\textcolor{red}{??The number-average chain length is the normalized first moment ($x_N=p^{(1)}/p^{(0)}$) and the mass-averaged chain length is the ratio of the second to first moments ($x_M=p^{(2)}/p^{(1)}$). The polysispersity is the ratio of mass-average to number-average ($I_{pd}=x_M/x_N$).??}

2. Set one-half inch margins on all sides
\usepackage[margin=0.5 in]{geometry}

3.  Single spacing
\usepackage{setspace} 
\singlespacing

4.  Set my font to Arial throughout the entire document.
\usepackage{helvet}

\renewcommand{\familydefault}{\sfdefault}

 

4 ways to motivate yourself after a break

Do you find it hard to start again your work after a break? Well, I suspended my work for about 11 days due to Christmas and New Year holiday, plus a short vacation and entertained some guests at our home. It such a long break, huh? I cannot continue my work at home at all because you know Alya, she is such an active girl and an attention seeker,  and yesterday I find it hard to continue back my work. I have no energy, the motivation just disappeared nowhere and I just couldn't focus! haishh..

But Alhamdulillah, today I got my strength back. So, here's an overview of the 4 key points of what I did to increase my inner motivation.

1. Solat tahajud & solat dhuha
I missed these solat sunat during the breaks and I need to start it again. It's not esasy to get up in the 2/3 night, take wudhu' and pray. Ask Allah's guidance and help. The biggest enemy is our own self. If you win, you can feel the difference.

2. Read PhD blogs
Read about PhD articles or other people's experience. My favorite blog is  http://drotspss.blogspot.com/. Thanks to Dr OT because his writing makes me feel to work harder.

3. Read your thesis/report
Just read your thesis or your own writing for PhD once, then read it again. Read it again and you will find that you will add some words automatically and edit it.

4. Read surah Al-fath
This is the surah that tell us about victory and I find it is so inspiring. "Marilah menuju kejayaan!"

In shaa Allah.. May Allah keep us in the right path to His jannah. May Allah make this PhD journey as a reason for us to stay close with Him. Amin Ya Rabb..

Kaitan antara mean dan variance

Timbul persoalan dari seorang rakan saya yang bertanya melalui facebook.

"Macam mana nak menerangkan perkaitan antara variance dengan mean? Yang saya tahu, nilai variance kecil menunjukkan data kita tidak jauh spreading among them, sekarang saya nak kaitkan dengan mean."

So, saya akan jawab mengikut pemahaman saya. Jika salah, harap diperbetul. Dan jika ada rakan-rakan matematik ingin menambah, sila komen di bawah ini ye.



Jawapan saya:

Variance memberi nilai seberapa jauh data kita tersebar atau terserak daripada mean. Apa kaitan antara mean dan variance? contohnya from a set of data, saya dapat variance sekian dan mean sekian. Ada hubungkait ke? kalau set data 1 kita dapat variance kecil, mean kecil. dari set data 2 variance besar, mean besar. Boleh ke kita ckp variance dan mean berkadar langsung? are you sure? tak semestinya, sometimes, variance besar, tapi mean kecil. cane nk jwb tu? So, it based on case lah. kena study case by case. Contoh relation antara mean dan variance ialah positive linear relationship. Sebenarnya terdapat researcher yang telah mengusulkan teknik untuk menentukan hubungkait antara mean dan variance (Tsung, 2006) dan banyak lagi teknik lain kot yang available. 

hmmm.. sekian saja untuk perkongsian kali ni. hehe.. terima kasih kepada yang bertanya. harap dapat membantu.

He is the boss

Hallooo girls... The winter break has started last Monday but I'm stucked in my office, typing, reading, sketching, erasing, singing (bile agak bosan), eating lunch, napping, online shopping (hehe.. ni bila dah kelabu mata baca jurnal), calculating, deriving and thinking. My Research Advisor had set certain milestones for me to complete during winter break. So, basically I don't have break. Yeah!  

So today, I gave him an email asking him to check my work.

 ---------------------------------------------------------------------
Dear Professor,
Please check my work on Nondimensionalization on page 14 of the attached file.
Thank you.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Then, he replied.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------
OK Nora, I will do it.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 


His answer made me smiled, feel like I'm the boss here. Haha.. (comel je jawapan dia). Btw, I don't have problem doing work during break because he pays us (all his PhD students) biweekly using his grantts. Alhamdulillah, I'm doing my own PhD research and get paid. That's why "Maka nikmat Allah yang manakah engkau dustakan."

OK, till then. 

saja nk tunjuk muka penuh bintik2, sampai x dpt bezakan mana satu tahi lalat, mana satu parut jerawat. Argh!!

My First Report

Salam peeps.. how are doing?

Fuh... what a great relieved. I just finished a discussion with my SV and at the same time presented my report to him. The report I told you guys in the previous post. I don't know whether he satisfied with it but he smiled all the way through the discussion. Well, one thing I sure that I'm satisfied with myself. Alhamdulillah..  Allah made it easier for me with the help of some of my friends who gave suggestions and tips. Special thanks to Kak Yanti Awang, Kak Yanti FIST, Kak Fizah, Kak Anis, and Ayen. May Allah rewards you. And I also want to share my tip with all of you. This worked for me since I was in the first year at USC. If you have a task to be completed, ask Allah to make it easier for you all the time. For example, I follow "Zikir Harian". Today is Friday and the the zikr for Friday is "Ya Allah".

"Ya Allah, permudahkanlah bagiku untuk siapkan research report ini"

Repeat this for the whole day while you are walking, cooking, sleeping etc. In sha Allah.. Allah will hear and be close to you, and the miracle will just pop out  in front of your eyes whether you noticed it or not.

And now, as expected I got lot more works to do. He asked me to add the following into the report: yield stress, reactive, transport, entire system, analysis, small and large parameters, asymptotic analysis, probability to mechanistic, spatial-temporal, nondimensionalization, and the list goes on.. WHAT?? Really? Seriously? that's require too much deep thinking and time friends. Now, I know I'm in the real business of research and I can see his expectation is quiet high. Actually, I knew this from the beginning. That's the reason I chose him as my SV. No, he chose me as his student and I agree. I can feel that this is a barakah from solat istikharah. Before that, I approached two potential supervisors but they don't really fit into my interest but  I still decide to stick with the second. Subhanallah, Allah showed me the third one in a way that we cannot expect or think. He hope that I can be a marketable mathematician like him. He always said that.

Ready or not, I must keep my head high, stay focus and follow his rythms. I'll try my best, but the result is in Allah's hand. May Allah make this PhD journey full of blessing and barakah and I wish the same for all my friends out there.

Amin Ya Rabb..

Till then.

Merangkak-rangkak! Duh...

Salam friends..

As in previous post,  I told you about tons of research papers scattered on my desk need to read. Because,.. by the end of this month, I need to submit a research report discussing about ONE paper using my own words and fill any gap by discussing every details of steps to my SV. Basically, I have 15 days to complete it, but now I feel something wrong with my work. I mean, my question is how to do that in simpler way. I realized that I didn't do it systematically. What I'm doing right now is I keep reading the related papers at the references and write some note that might be filling the gap of my understanding. To make things worse, I just copy and paste the sentence. Ouch! And now, my report consisting of various part from various authurs, and it's all messed up. This is not good. 

But, Alhamdulillah, yesterday I found this blog http://drotspss.blogspot.com/.. I think it might be helpful to me. Now, I spending some time to read that blog hoping that it will solve my problem, but I didn't finish it yet. There are so many tips and I don't know where to start. So guys, if you have knowledge about it, please please please share with me.

Jazakallahu khair. May Allah bless you. Amin Ya Rabb..

Turn your thesis into a book!

Assalammualaikum. Hi peeps, today I was overwhelmed by this email in my inbox. Just want to share with you guys, it might be benefited to you as well. Who knows..

To my close friends who just embarked their journey in PhD especially to Kak Yanti and Kak Lyn, I wish you good luck! and also those who still struggling in half way to finish PhD like me, umm... all the best ya!  I'm now in the first phase to begin my research. I was given a very simple task by my Research Advisor. "Read this paper (not these) , understand every details, and see me next week". Sound very relax and chill right. Not many papers, just one. As simple as that.

After 3 days, I still cannot figured out every details. Why the equation like that, why he use integral, why the limit is like that and so many questions arised. Then, I know I should  refer to the references at the back of the paper, printed it out and read. Some questions answered but more questions blurted out. Then, I searched more papers in the reference of the referenced paper. You know what I mean. At last, tons of papers scattered on my desk. From one single paper to one file of papers. Good! Now I know, this is the reality of research.

Allright guys, till then. Bye, bye.. stay focus and keep moving. May Allah make it easier for us. Amin Ya Rabb..

Ok, this is the email I said earlier:
___________________________________________________________________________

Dear Ms. Mohd Jamil

I hope this finds you well.  I am writing to you with regard to your work in the Department of Mathematics.

I would like to enquire as to whether you have given any thought to publishing your completed doctoral thesis as a book upon its completion? Should you be interested in such an endeavour, I would be delighted if you could spare a few minutes to consider our proposal below.

Cambridge Scholars is an independent academic publishing house, founded by former lecturers and researchers of Cambridge University, to promote knowledge and learning through the publication of high quality academic literature. While we publish across many disciplines, we have a longstanding presence in the field of Humanities & Social Sciences, and predominantly publish the research monographs and edited volumes of established academics; with over 3,000 titles currently on catalogue.

We also have a policy of dedicating 10% of our annual publication output to the work of aspiring academics, who might be taking their first steps into the world of publication. As such, we pro-actively seek out proposals from doctoral students at academic institutions across the world, with a view to potential publication; should their work prove to be of an exceptional academic standard, and should it be possible to revise and edit it to convert it from a thesis into a successful book.

We appreciate that you may still only be in the early stages of your doctorate and it may be too early to think about publishing a book based on your thesis; but this correspondence is simply to make you aware of this potential opportunity and to warmly introduce you to the services of our publishing house.

It is perhaps worth considering the benefits attributed to having a successful publication to one’s name, and what Cambridge Scholars can offer you in this regard:

1. Publishing a book is a terrific way to raise both your own profile and that of your academic work in your specialised field.

2. At Cambridge Scholars, we focus upon the publication of highly specialised academic literature which we feel deserves to be shared with a wider audience; please take a moment to review works within a similar field on our website (www.c-s-p.org).


3. Whilst the editorial process will require input from yourself, we do not charge you as an author for any part of the process.  Instead we offer a number of complimentary copies of the finished publication.

4. The copyright will remain with you, and Cambridge Scholars has no objections to you using chapters or excerpts from the thesis in academic journals or other publications, after consulting with us.

5. To ensure a high degree of quality control, every aspect of the production process is carried out internally.  This ensures a faster than normal turnaround (typically around 6 months) without compromising upon the quality of the publication.

6. We distribute and market our books through major international retailers such as Blackwell’s, Amazon, Ingram and Baker & Taylor; as well as advertising in internationally circulated publications such as The New York Review of Books and The London Review of Books. These aspects ensure your book will receive maximum exposure in the global academic market.

Thank you for taking the time to read our correspondence. If you are interested in publishing your thesis, either now or at some time in the future; please feel free to contact me to discuss the issue further and perhaps submit a proposal. If you are not interested in publishing your work however, I wish you every future success in your academic career.

With kind regards


Camilla


Camilla Harding
Commissioning Editor
Cambridge Scholars Publishing
www.c-s-p.org

Viva preparation

::::copy and paste from a post by kak Fizah Sarif in the Facebook::::

Dedicated to all friends yg sdg berjuang...insyallah..insyallah...insyallah

Salam to all future scholars: I really would like to spark with you the viva questions, we want to to share and highlight the strategies of answering viva questions?, We need feedback from those who already doing their viva and how they overcome?
Here I can put some of these questions:

...

In one sentence, what is your thesis?
What have you done that merits a PhD?
What is your original contribution to knowledge in your subject area?
What would you do differently if you could do your thesis again?
Who has had the strongest influence in the development of your subject area in theory and practice?
How long term is your contribution, given the anticipated future developments in X?
What have you learnt from your research experience?

ANSWER:

I had my viva in Oct 2005. Long time ago. I think, all those listed questions were asked, either directly or indirectly, during my viva. Let me share my personal take/suggestion on those:

→ In one sentence, what is your thesis?

My thesis is about ____________ (ISSUE); attempting to investigate ____________ (RESEARCH QUESTION) by employing _______________ (METHOD).

→ What have you done that merits a PhD?

I think the novel output/s of my research is/are mainly in terms of ________________ (choose one or a combination: METHOD/THEORY/FINDING) where __________________ (provide an ‘over-view’ description of your METHOD/THEORY/FINDING).

→ What is your original contribution to knowledge in your subject area?

The previous studies on ________________ (ISSUE) are mainly limited to ________________ (describe the main corpus of existing literature) in terms of (choose one or a combination: METHOD/THEORY/FINDING). My research has explored/found new dimensions, which are __________________ (describe yours, in relations to METHOD/THEORY/FINDING).

→ What would you do differently if you could do your thesis again?

Under the circumstances where my project had been operating the last _____ years, I believe I have done everything that is necessary based on the pre-determined scope of my research and the limitations that come with it. However, some recent studies (cite the most current literature on your ISSUE) have explored _________________________ (describe the latest METHOD/DATA/THEORY). Under these new circumstances, I would probably have ___________________ (describe what you want to do differently) instead of _______________ (describe what you did) during the ________________________ (specify the stage: framework building, data collection, analysis, interpretation, etc).

* My supervisor reminded me several times - that if I ever get asked this question - I must stay FIRM with what I had done. Sometimes the examiner may use this question to trick you into revealing the weakness of your research. But it might be also asked to test how broad your perspective is. So find a way to answer it based on a very specific context.

→ Who has had the strongest influence in the development of your subject area in theory and practice?

There is no clear consensus in literature of who is the most influential, but personally I think __________________ (state your choice) could take such credit for his/her contribution in __________________________________ (describe your justification).

OR

Based on the cumulative literatures, it is obvious that ____________________ (state the most notable scholar/s) has/have had the strongest influence in this subject area. However, for this specific sub-niche which has been the focus of my research, I think _________________ (state your choice) is the most influential because his/her work on ________________________ (describe his/her most related studies to your thesis) has established ______________________ (the most impressive element of the work).

* This kind of question normally has no WRONG or RIGHT answer. The examiners simply want to know how you position your own scholarly outlook, as a potential PhD graduate. So it is always good to be a little bit assertive – and not afraid to make a stance.

→ How long term is your contribution, given the anticipated future developments in X?

The main contribution of my thesis is related to method/framework/theory which has addressed _____________ (describe the specific issues/problems). It will remain relevant until new _________________ (describe how your contribution functions) is established, which may take _____________ (give your estimate: e.g. 5-10) years.

* This question is not so common for social sciences/humanities candidate. I guess, this is mostly for applied sciences/economics and education.

→ What have you learnt from your research experience?

I learn that PhD is a very interesting journey. There are many different options to achieve the same objective; and each one of these methods has its own scientific merit, which is neither more nor less valid than the others.

* This was actually my answer (not the exact quote – but implied this meaning) for the same question. Because throughout my viva, the two examiners were quite obsessive in suggesting many new different methods (which they thought were better than what I did).

To other friends, pls share...

First day for the three of us..

First day for the three of us.. This was actually happened last Thursday, Sept 13 2012. My husband started his new job, my daughter stayed with her babysitter after a very long time was pampered by his father at home, and I got a new office. All I can say is Alhamdulillah, all praise is due to Allah.

That the things we want to happen. It's good for my husband because he can earn more money, after being sick of staying at home for years. That's good for my daughter so that she can learn how to make friends and improve her spoken english. An office in the math department which was allocated for me is really awesome. I don't have to bring heavy books and laptop to library anymore, I can perform solah easily, plus my office is next to my Research Advisor's office. So, I have to do my work when he is around. hehe..

Another thing that I want to announce is, I passed my Comprehensive Exam. Subhanallah, even it was really hard and stressful, Allah helped me. I did bad in written part and Alhamdulillah I redeemed myself in oral part.

The oral part (something like presentation) was always been a nightmare for me since I came to US. I had a trauma when it comes to do a presentation in front of audiences. (I told you my story in a previous post). This time the audiences were consisted of 5 professors only. Scary, right? They were the ones who write the exam's questions and another one is a guest from outside of the department. So, I made sure that I know how to solve all the problems, seek help from my classmate and went to see each of the professors. I got to do this.

Actually, I had a "petua" to do well in a presentation. You should try this. It's a worth to try, nothing to lose. Recite 40 times of Surah Yasseen and make a doa to Allah so that He can make the presentation going well.

I've done it and that worked for me. I felt very close to Allah and truly belived that He will help me. On that day, I answered most of the questions confidently. Some questions were hard, but somehow Allah gave me a "ilham" to answer. Subhanallah, even the thing that I don't understand before, He gave me the knowledge and understanding on that time. It's called rizq. I explained to the professors and they looked satisfied. My oral exam was only took about one hour, they said "you're better than other student, they made to two hours." When the panel announced that I passed, there were tears in my eyes. I can assure you, that's happy tears. Alhamdulillah..




Mental note: Prepare for research group meeting. Read research papers and present them to the audience with a limited time frame.

Count down exam

Assalammualaikum sahabat2 yang jauh di mata, dekat di hati. Kadang-kadang rindu sgt ngn korang esp geng2 fist. Rindu nk keje pun ada gak. Hari ni nak post dalam bahasa malaenglish broken, my mothertongue. Nak tulis in english lambat plak nk menaipnya dan lepas tu kena check grammar plak, masa lapang dahla x banyak mana. Ni pun nk cpt. But indeed, write in english is good exercise for you to write your thesis. Next time la.. kalau banyak masa. hehehe..  

Fuh.. fuh.. fuh.. pejam celik, pejam celik tinggal seminggu lagi nak exam. Rasa macam tak percaya, sejak bulan Mei aku start study secara berjadual, (berjadual la sgt, tp kadang2 x ikut gak sbb otak dah tepu n bosan sampai nk muntah..) Akhirnya kini tibalah hari-hari terakhir menghadapi exam yang telah mengorbankan jiwa raga dan keseronokan. hehe..  dan yang pastinya banyak giler bende kena ingat.  Preparation setakat ni okla kot, dah last2 minute ni aku study je apa yang mampu. Ada gak part yang susah giler nak faham yg aku reservekan untuk minggu terakhir ni. Tapi tak taulah sempat ke tak nak habiskan. Usaha dan tawakal je.

Ni nak cerita sikit content exam tu. Proving tu biasalah memang wajib. Kalau nak prove setakat 1 page tu ok lagi, ni 3 pages. ammak!! Apa taknya, bila prove 1 theorem tu perlu result dari theorem lain, pastu bukan boleh pakai amik je result tu, kena prove dulu. So memang macam pembuktian dalam pembuktian. Kadang-kadang kompius gak nak guna theorem mana.Memang banyak giler step die and sooo.. complicated. Tahap pecah kepala punye. Ambik kau.. haha..

Tu part proving, subjek lain plak Perturbation Methods, ni aku suka sebab byk kira-kira. Mostly in PDE and ODE. Tapi methods nya plak banyak dowh. Nak kena fikir guna method apa yang sesuai, dan stepnya juga banyak. Ishk.. kenapala kat US ni ada exam cenggini. Buat aku tensi saja!

Ada lagi satu subjek iaitu combination antara proving n applied. Aku tak berapa suka prof yang mengajar subjek ni sebab die tak sistematik. pening ngk die mengajar dalam kelas. at last, aku salin je la ape yg ditulis kat blackboard. Bila baca balik nota die, aku still tak faham gak. Cane wehh??

Aku ada gak bincang2 ngan kawan2. Tapi yelah, budak chinese n american dalam kelas tu genius. Ilmu dari mana ntah diorang belajar, tak alih2 tunjuk formula/theorem yang tak pernah aku tau. ala-ala macam cerita alien yang turun ke bumi pastu ajar orang kat bumi. bayangkan je lah beza tahap pengetahuan aku ngn diorang. Tapi takpe, aku belajar sikit2, tak dapat banyak, just ikut kemampuan aku sendiri je.

Tanda-tanda stress sudah dikesan sejak minggu lepas. Sampai demam-demam, sakit kepala, selsema dan seram sejuk. Alya n husband pun kena jangkit. Tapi alhamdulillah sekarang dah sihat walafiat. Emosi je yang tak berapa nak sihat. dup dap dup dap..  kecut perut. Sekarang ni husband yang  hantar n amik aku dari library. Walaupun biasenya aku jalan kaki, tp memandangkan bulan pose kat cni cuaca panas terik, sampai badan aku terhidrat. Lagipun untuk elak aku demam lagi. Mungkin aku tak berapa nak menikmati raya tahun ni sebab sehari lepas raya ada paper terakhir. "Last paper.. last paper" (ikut gaya Johan dalam Lawak ke der.. kalau korang tengoklah cite tu..) hihi..

Ok, kat bawah ni gambar fountain depan library. Kebetulan ada rainbow masa aku tgh tunggu papa n alya datang amik.:)

amik mama

oklah.. cau cincau my friends.. selamat mengejar score Ramadhan. Jom khatam quran, korang dah juzuk berapa?

Antara juadah iftar, syukur..

Student life - A Class Presentation

Yesterday, I made a class presentation. It went well, Alhamdulillah. This was a part of our final exam for Nonlinear Approximation Theory. Everybody in the class chose a topic given by the Professor and wrote ten pages report about it in LATEX and present in using BEAMER. My topic was One-Dimensional Finite Element Method. I like this class and I could say that this is the best class I've ever attended here. Why? Because the Professor is very systematic person. I like systematic teacher very much. Hard subjects become easy if the Professor is systematic in teaching and evaluating. I wish I can be like him. In Shaa Allah.. Enjoy some pictures..

Some of my classmates.

I was the first presenter.

Q&A session

Till then. Miss you all :)

Damn tired

The take home final exam is so hard. The professor said it is open ended problem and perhaps you could make a paper. hmm.. you can imagine how hard is that  right? I spent entirely one week to answer that problem but it went to nowhere. The stress is come when your heart ask you to read and search but your mental said you are tired searching for the answer. I read the lecture notes many times bit by bit and referred tons of paper/journal. I need to do this whole heartedly because the proffesor is the one who hired me as his RA. Today is the duedate but I'm not feel good about that.

"Ya Allah, keluarkan aku dari kegelapan ragu-ragu, muliakan daku dengan sinaran kefahaman, dan bukakan bagiku pintu ilmu dan hiasilah daku dengan akhlak yang baik dan kasih sayang. Amin.."

Tense

Crowded.. hoyeah..

The library was so crowded that I couldn't find a seat. The library is seven floors, it's actually really big. After walked through, at last, I got a seat at the level 1, which was in underground floor. But, when my laptop was out of battery, I can't reach the power supply since I have to overcross other student's table. So, I leaved that seat, walked again and found another one at level 3. Alhamdulillah.. I was thinking that I'll just study at home which is not easy for me since Alya will bother. Usually, it's not crowded like this. I guess it's because final exam season. Everyone is busy preparing for that. As for me, I don't have exams, but I was given take home final exam for three subjects which are more hard. Basically, you will not find the answers from books, but in your brain. It requires time, hard work, and most important, dedication. May Allah make it easier for me. Amin Ya Rabb..

,

I always recite this doa before study. It was written by Imam Masjid Skudai (J's father) when they visited to our house at Columbia.